To Love and Be Loved - The Essentials in Establishing Real Relationships

Everything in life hinges on relationship. Relationship building is essential in our life, work and closing sales. In fact, it is everything. Notice some people seem so naturally blessed at being loved and loving others? There is something alluring in them and others are naturally gravitated towards them. What are they doing right?

Wait no further, let's break the code together.

1. Instinctively give, instead of receive

The most powerful, influential and successful people you will ever meet always look for ways to do nice things for others. When you meet someone under almost any circumstance, one of the best questions you can ask is this, "Is there anything that I can do for you?" This is best when you have established a certain level of trust and friendship with the other party.

In the event that this sense of trust is yet to be established, the above may turn out awkward and obtrusive. Thus, another way of doing this is to listen to what they have to say through the conversation. Subsequently, decipher what they are saying and assess what you can do to help them.

Some people may not be able to articulate their needs well. At this juncture, it is important for you to be intuitive and always look for ways to put in rather than to take out. The successful man or woman of today is a "go-giver" as well as a go-getter.

2. Be Open and Empathetic

The more that people feel that you are open and empathetic and sensitive to their needs and concerns, the more open they will be to your influencing them positively in some way. However, a caution to note. The motivation behind your actions have to be sincere. Remember people have an in- born "lie detector" and some people will sniff you out in disgust if you are insincere.

The more you can influence others with the power and impact of your personality, the more you will accomplish, and the faster you will accomplish it. This will help you move toward the great success that you desire and deserve.

More importantly, positive externalities are created as you raise the bar for those whom you inspired and touched as well.

Good actions have to be multiplied and the more people whom you can inspire, the more value you can create for everyone. Isn't this a beautiful win- win situation?

3. The Power of "Now!"

Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

Firstly, look for ways to do nice things for other people. You can start small and do something for your family. Make them feel appreciated by thanking your wife for the wonderful dinner she has cooked for you, hug your kids when they share their daily life with you. Be thankful for everything. Keep doing it until it is ingrained into you like a habit. Gradually, extend this to your friends, customers and colleagues etc. The more nice things you do for others, the better you feel about yourself.

Secondly, take time to really listen to people, especially your staff and coworkers. The more and better you listen to others, the more you are able to create a ring of trust. Learn to be a powerful communicator with listening and influence others with the right words and actions. This is imperative for you to create a positive influence in their life.

Online Dating Sites Help Military Personnel Find Love and Friendship

Military life can be complicated, but a person in the military doesn't need to give up on the idea of dating and finding love. Online dating sites for military personnel and military pen pal sites for military service men and women and the civilians are interested in meeting them are a fantastic resource for men and women to find love and build a lasting relationships while serving their country.

Is an Online Dating Site for Military Personnel Right For You?

I met my husband a few years ago, using an online dating site that specializes in helping military servicemen and women find friendship and true love. And, now I can say that using a specialty online dating site to find my match was the best decision I've ever made.

When I met my husband, Cody was a sergeant who had just been deployed. I was a woman who had been alone for several years following the end of a fairly long-term relationship. I was ready to start over and serious about finding the perfect relationship. Almost by chance, I read an article in USA Today: Cupid's Arrow Land's in a War Zone.

That article sure got me to thinking!

According to the author, Greg Zorraya, military servicemen and women take relationships darned seriously. They spend more time enjoying online conversations with friends and partners than the average online dater in the United States. And, military servicemen and women can be quite focused and down to earth. They know what they want, aren't chasing rainbows and, in general, they don't assume the grass on the other side is always greener.

The article also pointed out that the availability of email, web cams and internet cafes on military bases all around the world make it easy for servicemen and women to get in touch and stay in touch with friends and partners. According to Zorraya, the number of service men and women seeking partners using an online dating site has increased by 56% in past five years.

I also read a convincing explanation for why military personnel make terrific dates written by Gian Gonzaga, an eHarmony.com research psychologist. Gian wrote:

    The life-altering experience of going to war often focuses the romantic mind. When you are reminded of your own mortality, the theory kind of boils down to you remembering what's most important to you: Relationships.

Well, I decided to give a military pen pal site a try.

I had nothing to lose, right? Maybe I'd meet someone who was nice, I thought. Maybe, I'd give cheer and comfort to someone stationed overseas, far from friends and family.

Sites like eHarmony and Match.com can be expensive although they often offer discount pricing. But don't let the price scare you away. Dating sites online are extremely popular. New niche sites designed for military personnel and, quite frankly, every lifestyle imaginable, are helping people all over the world connect with each other and build lasting relationships. Many of these sites are free or extremely affordable.

Of course, attraction is key.

But, when you're thousands of miles apart and getting to know each other online, good conversation is what builds a strong relationship. What's more, the medium, internet communication technology, encourages communication in a remarkably direct way.

Cody and I were positively attracted to one another, but it was the distance between us and the web technology available through our online dating website, emails, sms texting and a webcam, that led us to talk. And, I mean seriously talk!

Conversation, at first, friendly and flirtatious, became deep and personal; over time, becoming a kind of glue that joined us and led to our marriage.

Cody, longing for life back home, doted on my every word with genuine interest. Never before had I felt so appreciated. As for me, I listened, intensely fascinated, as Cody described his daily routine, sometimes dangerous, sometimes mundane, but always something that I wanted to learn more about and discuss with him. His everyday experiences, sometimes life and death experiences, drew me to him. I was fierce in my desire to protect him from danger; I was proud of the job he was doing and terrified I might lose him to his work.

Together, we cherished every moment shared online and looked forward to a time when we could talk in each other's arms with a growing desire.

Now we live together and are in each other's arms all the time. But, we haven't forgotten how we fell in love. Talking and listening to each another, reveling in each other's accomplishments and providing unwavering support for one another when things were less than perfect.

People change. But the key ingredient in our relationship, powerful interpersonal communication survives. I believe that is because we built the relationship online with the help of an online dating service designed for specifically for military servicemen and women and civilians, like me, interested in connecting with someone in the military.

Cody was my best first and last date ever.

Military life can be more complicated than civilian life, but that doesn't mean that a person in the military needs to give up on the idea of dating and finding love. Online dating for military personnel is a fantastic way to create a lasting relationship.